


The Empty Grave

by Nikky_the_writer



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-12 10:56:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16871659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nikky_the_writer/pseuds/Nikky_the_writer
Summary: During the saddest part of Reader’s life,  she made the biggest decision ever.Warnings: blood, cursing, violence, mentions of death





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on my Tumblr: @nikky-the-writter

It all started with three simple, but meaningful words. Something that you hoped to hear, but now when you look back, you wish you never did. It was amazing while it lasted and as fast it started, it ended as well.

* * *

Taking a deep breath you moved your hand higher. You were climbing on the Avengers tower. The wind almost knocked you away a couple of times.

˝Next time, you are doing this Wade.˝ You said into your earpiece. Hearing his laugh, you rolled your eyes. You were already on the thirtieth floor, almost on the roof. After a while you finally climbed on the solid ground. You sat down catching your breath and looking down over the edge. 

˝This is so fucking high. Why Victor couldn’t do this? I could’ve died,˝ you said through the smile.

˝It wouldn’t be your first time,˝ you heard Victor’s voice.

˝You ready guys?˝ you felt that your heart was beating fast, so you closed your eyes slowing it down. Removing your special gloves for climbing you put your leather one which gave you better support when you would hold a sword.

˝Go,˝ Wade said and you quickly walked to the elevator door. There was a loud bang outside, it meant that you had around ten minutes to secure the asset and leave.

Stepping in the elevator you put the mask over your face. It covered your face to the eyes and you moved the black hood of your suit over your head. You took two guns from your holster and you leaned against the elevator wall. You had two swords on your back, two more guns and a few knives on your legs. You were ready to take the asset. The elevator door opened and you quietly walked through the hallway. It was quiet because all the attention was on Wade and Victor who were a distraction for the Avengers. Coming closer to the end of the hallway you could hear that somebody was walking in the room, it had to be your target.

˝Nice hair, pretty boy,˝ the brown haired man turned around. His eyes were staring at you confused.

˝Who are you? ˝ his voice was deep and you stepped forward.

˝The person with a gun,˝ he chuckled at that, coming closer to you.

˝I don’t need a gun to bring you down.˝

˝Oh, neither do I, but it’s faster this way and I’m on the clock here.˝ 

He shrugged his shoulder before he tried to take the gun from you.

˝I didn’t come to play games.˝ You said shooting him five times with sedative darts

He stumbled back and his body collapsed to the floor.

˝Okay, the easy part is done and now the hard part,˝ you mumbled to yourself. You lowered your body to where he was lying, moving his hands over your shoulder and lifting yourself up with his body pressed on your left shoulder.

˝Wade, this guy is so fucking heavy.˝

˝I know, that’s why you are carrying him,˝ he laughed loudly.

˝Y/N/N, I think you’ll have company in a few minutes,˝ Victor said and you rushed to the elevator.

˝I’ll be on the roof soon, just waiting for the elevator to come,˝ you said, bouncing your fingers on the wall.

˝Don’t wait for it, they could be inside.˝

˝Who? You idiots should’ve taken care of them.˝ You were annoyed there was no way that you could carry this man for fifteen floors.

˝We lost Cap, Widow and that little kid,˝ you heard the elevator doors opening and you take step back throwing the man’s body on the ground.

˝Let’s play,˝ you said to yourself, taking your two guns, but this time with real bullets. You start shooting, hitting Captain in the shoulder, he launched towards you and you kept shooting, but he shield himself and the other two with his shield. You throw the guns on the ground, taking the swords. You let them come closer and you slide on the ground next to captains leg cutting him. Widow tried to shoot you, but you easily deflected every bullet with your swords. The kid hit you with something sticky.

˝Kid better checked that up, it’s gross. ˝ He was holding the other end of it trying to pull you closer, but you easily pulled him towards you, knocking him on the ground in front of your feet. You placed the end of your sword to his neck.

˝Captain, Widow, put it down.˝ 

Cap threw the shield on the ground and Widow followed. You lifted the kid by his collar, none of them were wearing uniforms, the kid couldn’t be older than sixteen. You were holding him by his neck and you looked at the Captain.

˝What the hell are you doing here? God, he was a toddler a few days ago, what’s wrong with you people?˝ You asked, you could hear that the man on the ground was waking up so you quickly shoot him with the gun in your free hand.

˝You are holding him hostage and yo-˝

˝He is a child Steve and we are not in the war,” you stated and Steve’s expression changed.

˝Wilson, cancel the job,˝ you said in your earpiece. You stepped into the elevator and in the moment that door was closing you push the kid out. You moved your weapons in their place. You were lacking one of your swords and two guns.

˝What went wrong?˝ You heard Victor’s voice, they were breathing heavily they were probably on the run.

˝I want nothing with these people,˝ you stated with hate. As the elevator door opened you could hear footsteps approaching. You quickly moved to the edge of the roof.

˝You can’t get out of this.˝ 

You turned around seeing both super soldiers standing in front of you. You moved closer to the edge.

˝It doesn’t have to end like this,˝ Steve said coming closer to you.

˝If we don’t take a risk, how will we ever find greatness?˝ you said falling over the edge.

Steve screamed, he knew those words. He knew; he remembered.

You hit the ground and you couldn’t move. You felt somebody picking you up. It was Wade.

˝Rogers, you really fucked yourself up this time.˝

* * *

_When the person who holds our heart die, do we die as well or do we keep on living with the hole in our chest?_

_You felt empty, lonely. There was nothing that could force you to get up from your bed. This was already the second time it happened, but this time he was really dead. Tomorrow will be his funeral, Steve already came back to bury his best friend, his brother. You would wonder was it hard for him like it was for you. He would sometimes hold you and you both would cry, but today he didn’t even enter your room. He was spending time with Bucky’s family. You were alone in a silent room, staring at the cracked ceiling. This was your turning point, the moment when you will have to decide what to do next in your life. Will you stay and mourn or run away and forget?_

* * *

˝Steve are you in here? ˝Bucky asked, walking into Steve’s room. Steve quickly wiped his tears and he put the picture down.

˝Yeah.˝

Bucky saw his friend on the floor next to his bed and he sat down. He took the picture in his hand and he stared at it.

˝Do you remember her?˝ Steve asked. Bucky kept looking at the smiling girl with messy hair. Her hands were around Steve’s waist as he smiled for the camera. He could remember, he was the one who took that picture.

˝I dream about her, I still love her. ˝

˝So do I,˝ Steve took the photo back in his hand and he put it on his bed.

˝What happened to her? I didn’t want to ask before ‘case it was probably hard for you.˝

˝It still is. She died while I was under ice,˝ Steve said, shifting his legs.

˝Was she happy?˝

˝I don’t know. I asked Tony if he could find her. He only found her grave, nothing else.˝ Steve was crying and Bucky put his arm around his shoulders.

˝She was such a happy person.˝ 

Steve moved hearing those words because you weren’t, not after Bucky died. He opened the box on his bed to put the picture back.

˝Why do you have that? ˝ Bucky asked harshly taking the shining object from the box.

˝She left it,˝ Steve said, feeling guilty that Bucky saw it because now he will have to tell him the truth.

˝When?˝ Steve looked at the ground, he felt sorry for Bucky.

˝I found it after your funeral, she never came, and the day before, was the last time I saw her.˝ Bucky’s eyes were red and he was crying.

˝She never said goodbye? ˝

˝Buck, she lost you twice, she cried for a few days.˝ Steve was standing in front of him and Bucky headed towards the door.

˝I just thought… I don’t know. Now I’ll never know if she was happy.˝ Bucky walked away with ring between his fingers hoping that you were with him now. He hoped that he never left you and that he married the love of his life. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During the saddest part of Reader’s life, she made the biggest decision ever.
> 
> Warnings: blood, cursing, violence, mentions of death

˝Tony! ˝ Tony lifted his head from the tablet hearing Steve’s voice.

˝I’m busy. Can it wait? I have to find out why FRIDAY didn’t stop her from entering the building.˝ Tony’s eyes were back at his tablet.

˝I need you to find my sister,˝ Steve kept his voice low.

˝Not now Capsicle, you know where to find her, I already told you. ˝

Steve grabbed the tablet from Tony’s hands. ˝It wasn’t a request, Stark. ˝

˝I would advise you to step back, Rogers. ˝ 

Steve offered him his tablet back and Tony took it. ˝I have to know. ˝ 

Tony could understand how he felt, but there wasn’t much that he could do about it. ˝What do you want from me Steve? I tried to find her, there’s nothing. ˝

Steve’s face changed and Tony knew what Steve wanted.

˝I’m not doing that, there can’t be a good enough reason for that,˝ Tony started walking away.

˝The other day. I think it was her!˝ 

Tony stopped in his track and turned on his feet. ˝You really want to dig your sister’s grave. Have you thought about how it will hurt you if she is inside? ˝ Tony came close to him putting his hand on his shoulder. ˝I know that it’s weird that there’s no record about her and I know you are afraid that Hydra took her, but they wouldn’t bury her. ˝

˝Didn’t you ask yourself Tony, who did bury her? ˝ Steve gaze was on the ground, he could remember your smile.

˝Why do you think that it was her? ˝

˝Before she threw herself, she said something. Something that Y/N used to tell me every day, but stopped when I used it against her to explain why I wanted to go to war. ˝ Steve could remember every argument you two had, he missed you.

˝What did she say? ˝

˝ If we don’t take a risk, how will we ever find greatness,˝ he said with a sad smile.

˝And you used that against her?˝ Tony asked to type something on the tablet.

˝Yeah, but she would always win. She would ask me where is the greatness for those who will have to bury their father or brother who took the risk? ˝

˝And you left her? ˝ Tony asked confused.

˝Yeah.˝

˝I arranged. They will dig the grave today, hope that she is not inside. And the girl from the other day, there’s a possibility she didn’t survive the fall.˝ Tony was ready to walk away when he heard Steve.

˝Bucky can’t know about this.˝

˝To be honest with you I don’t like him, but why should I lie to him?˝ Tony asked glaring at him.

˝Because Bucky promised to marry her when he comes back and you know that he didn’t come back until now. It hurt me so much when I realized that everybody who I knew was dead, it was even harder for him when he remembered that he broke the promise. ˝

Tony parted his lips to say something, but there was nothing that he could say.

˝Please, Tony just-˝

˝Steve is everything alright? ˝ Bucky asked concerned.

˝Yeah. ˝

˝Are you sure because the meeting already started.˝ Bucky looked at Steve, who didn’t know what to say.

˝Oh, yeah, tell everyone that meeting will be tomorrow. I still have to gather some information,”  Tony said.

˝I’ll be in a gym then,˝ Bucky quickly walked away. He didn’t go to the gym, he went to his room. He didn’t want Steve to worry about him. He stole the picture from Steve and he would just stare at it for hours. 

* * *

_˝Again? What is wrong with you Steve? Do you really want to die? ˝ You begged him to stay. You finally thought that he will stay at home, but then he came to you talking about some German scientist._

_˝I have to do it,” Steve said, moving closer to you._

_˝Why?˝ you coldly asked._

_˝I have to do it for my country, for all those people wh-˝_

_˝Answer me this Steve. Are you doing this for them or for yourself to prove everyone that you have a worth? Are you that stupid?” You were shouting and tears ran down your cheeks._

_˝I have to do it Y/N, all my life, people looked at me like I’m nothing.˝ Steve was talking quietly and you came closer to him._

_˝You don’t think that I don’t know how does it feel to be like that, you are forgetting that we shared the same womb. But if you think that you have to prove yourself to someone then leave. Just go away ‘cause I don’t want to see you ever again! ˝_

_˝You don’t mean that, ˝ Steve was heartbroken. He came closer, putting his hand on your shoulder._

_˝I can’t lose you,” you said, pulling him in the hug._

_˝You won’t I promise. ˝_

_But can we really keep a promise? Is it the promise just a word that gives us hope that give us something to hold on to when we feel like we are falling?_

* * *

  


 

The rain was falling on his hair as he watched the man opening the casket. He was already crying, he didn’t know for what should he hope for. Hope that you are inside knowing that Hydra didn’t touch you or hoping for the empty casket not knowing are you still alive. At the moment the casket was open, he felt sick. Tony looked first and he couldn’t look into Steve’s eyes.

˝I’m sorry Steve. ˝ 

Steve took a step forward and there you were, his sister a pile of bones, nothing more and nothing less. He broke down over your casket. ˝God, Why? I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. ˝ He kept repeating. Tony asked for privacy from the man that dug the grave and they left, leaving them alone.

˝Steve we should leave. This is not right, we have to bury her. ˝

˝How… I.. I… I can’t… I just.. she.. ˝ Steve was still in shock. Tony came closer to him he was about to ask him again to leave when he saw something. He reached inside the casket to take a piece of paper that was between the fingers of the skeleton.

˝Steve. ˝

Steve looked up and he took the paper in his hands. 

˝What is that?˝ Tony asked while Steve unfolded the paper.

˝A poem˝ Steve said confused, he started reading it and he recognized the first line, but he couldn’t understand why it was there. It was Mary Elizabeth Frye’s poem written with your hand, as he started reading further, he started to realize and tear roll down his cheek, while Tony stared at him.

* * *

> _Do not stand at my grave and weep._
> 
> _I am not there; I do not sleep._
> 
> _I am a thousand winds that blow;_
> 
> _I am the diamond glints on snow._
> 
> _I am the sunlight on ripened grain;_
> 
> _I am the gentle autumn’s rain._
> 
> _When you wake up to morning’s hush_
> 
> _I am the swift uplifting rush_
> 
> _Of quiet birds in circled flight._
> 
> _I am the stars that shine at night._
> 
> _Do not stand at my grave and cry._
> 
> _I am not there; I did not die._


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During the saddest part of Reader’s life, she made the biggest decision ever.
> 
> Warnings: blood, cursing, violence, mentions of death

˝Wade stop! ˝ your screams could be heard in an empty building. Your body was placed on the old metal table full of rust.

˝Come on, Y/N/N, I just started.˝ Wade was glancing at Victor, who put a wooden plate in between your teeth and held your hands on each side of your head. You screamed when Wade pulled your leg, the bone was sticking out and he had to put it back so that you could heal faster. You couldn’t take it anymore, spitting out the plate you lifted your head feeling dizzy. 

˝Can you see her?˝ Your vision was blurry and you couldn’t focus on anything only seeing a form of a little girl running away from you. She looked just like you when you were a kid. ˝You have to catch her.˝ 

Victor let go of your hands and you grabbed Wade’s arm pulling him closer. ˝Catch her! ˝ 

Wade glanced at Victor and your head hit the table as you passed out. Just a second after Wade heard you singing a lullaby that gave him the chills. Your eyes were closed and he lifted you up to bring you back home.

˝Sleep, sleep, sleep, don’t lie too close to the edge of the bed,

Or little grey wolf will come and grab you by the flank,

Drag you into the woods, underneath the willow root. ˝

* * *

_Gentle touch woke you up. You smiled seeing Bucky by your side._

_˝Steve will kick your ass if he finds you here. ˝ You said, snuggling closer to his chest._

_˝Than be quiet and he won't˝, he said softly and you giggled._

_˝What about you? You weren’t quiet yesterday, if he was home, he would lose it. ˝ Closing your eyes you traced random patterns on his bare chest._

_˝'Cause you drive me crazy, doll. ˝ Bucky kissed the top of your head and you looked at him placing your hands on his shoulders._

_˝I wasn’t the one who came into my room, taking his shirt off at the speed of light,” you giggled placing your lips on his jaw._

_˝We should really tell him. ˝_

_˝He knows, “ you said getting up._

_˝What?˝  
_

_You just nodded, not thinking there’s anything more to say. You never kept secrets from your brother, you and Steve were really close._

_˝When did you tell him? ˝ Bucky sat up on the bed pulling the blanket away._

_˝When you asked me out. ˝_

_˝That was eight months ago!˝_

_You could see that Bucky was mad. He never wanted to hide this from Steve and he felt bad about lying to him._

_˝Bucky, just calm down. He said that it was okay, I mean the dating thing, but he said if you sleep with me that he will kick your ass.˝ You smiled turning your back to him._

_He smiled, but his smile quickly faded when he saw your hips. There were purple bruises that he left the night before. He reached toward you, pulling you closer, tracing his fingers over them._

_˝I’m sorry,” he whispered in your ear._

_˝Buck, it’s okay, it will fade in a couple of days. It doesn’t really hurt. ˝_

_He digs his finger in your hip and you almost screamed._

_˝It doesn’t hurt, really? Y/N/N, doll… ˝ He moved you towards the bed, pulling you in his lap._

_˝You have to tell me when I’m hurting you.˝ Bucky was feeling guilty, he loved you with his whole heart and seeing those bruises, he hated himself for that._

_˝It’s really nothing,” you looked away from him and he lifted your chin with his finger._

_˝Why wouldn’t you tell me? ˝ he was genuine concern about you._

_˝'Cause you like it rough,” you stated and he looked at you with his blue eyes._

_˝What’s that suppose to mean? I was never rough with you. ˝_

_˝Just forget about it, it’s just my stupid body. It bruises easily and… ˝_

_˝Hey, don’t cry,” he hugged you carefully and you cried in his arms. You had a lot of health problems like Steve and Bucky would sometimes forget about it. You loved him and there was never doubt in your mind that he would leave you for somebody who is healthier ‘cause he wasn’t that kind of a man._

* * *

˝Sleep, sleep, sleep, don’t lie too close to the edge of the bed,

Or little grey wolf will come and grab you by the flank,

Drag you into the woods, underneath the willow root. ˝

Opening your eyes you saw a small girl sitting on your bed singing. She had long blond hair and her smile could brighten up the whole room. Closing your eyes again, you repeated the song in your head. It meant so much to you. You overheard that song from your neighbor when you were a kid. She was a bit older than you and she taught you the English version because she was originally from Russia. It was the only thing that you could remember from your childhood, you could only remember the song that the blond girl taught you.

˝Are you feeling better? ˝ Victor was standing in the door frame and you sat up quickly making your head spin.

˝I’ll be alright. ˝ 

Heading to the kitchen Wade was already eating in his suite.

˝Do we have a job? ˝ Wade nodded, he was excited like a child on Christmas day. Victor sat next to you at the island handing you bowl with cereals.

˝How long was I out? ˝

˝Can’t you see it on Victor’s stubble? “ Wade almost threw his spoon in Victor’s direction.

˝I don’t get it. It’s just like usual. ˝

˝Well, that’s the clue. ˝

˝Fifteen hours. ˝ Victor said tired of Wade’s games.

˝Who’s the target? ˝

˝Secretary Ross. ˝

˝Let me guess, just kidnapping? ˝ Wade nodded.

˝Wher’s the spirit Y/N/N, nobody said in what condition he should be delivered. ˝ Wade added and you shrugged your shoulders.

˝I’ll pass. ˝

Wade and Victor looked at you confused and you just kept staring at your bowl.

˝You never said no to the job. Is everything alright? ˝

˝Victor, of course, it’s not alright. We did this so many times, it’s boring. We have money, we could just leave. ˝ You stood up from the table looking them. ˝I’m out. ˝

˝What will you do, you don’t have anywhere to go? ˝ Wade came closer to you.

˝I’ll figure it out. I always do. ˝

˝Good luck,˝ Victor gave you a hug and Wade just stared at you as you walked to your room, taking your stuff.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During the saddest part of Reader’s life, she made the biggest decision ever.
> 
> Warnings: blood, cursing, violence, mentions of death

Steve walked through the Tower like a zombie. His face was pale and his eyes were red. He didn’t even talk to anyone. That poem that he found hunted him because he didn’t know who put in there. It couldn’t be you, Tony ran tests on the bones from the casket and he compared them with Steve. There wasn’t any other explanation than that you were there. He walked slowly to his room. 

˝Why do you have this, Steve? ˝ Bucky asked when Steve walked into his room. He was too tired to fight with his best friend so he just ignored him and headed to the bathroom, but Bucky stopped him.

˝Where did you get this?˝ Bucky’s hands were shaking, holding the scrambled paper. ˝Answer me!˝ Bucky was losing it, his eyes were completely dark.

˝From here grave.˝ Steve quietly said with tears in his eyes.

˝You dug her grave? What is wrong with you?˝ Bucky sat back on Steve’s bed. He held his head in hands. ˝Why would you do that? She is your sister.˝ Bucky said, swallowing the lump in his throat.

˝I had to know,” Steve stepped closer and Bucky looked at him.

˝You don’t even know what this poem means to her. ˝

Steve shook his head, and Bucky took a deep breath.

˝The first time when I was missing, she found this poem. She told me that itgave her hope in finding me again. This was her hope and now, you took it away from her! ˝

˝Look at the corner.˝

˝What? ˝Bucky quickly opened the paper looking in the corner and he stayed shocked.

˝Tony said that she is in the grave, but the date says otherwise. ˝ Steve said sitting next to his friend.

˝Maybe someone is just playing with us. ˝ Bucky put the poem on the bed turning to Steve.

˝What if she was reaching out with this? ˝ Steve hopefully asked.

˝It can’t be. It’s written two days after you said she died. ˝

˝And now put it on the light. ˝

Bucky held the paper towards the light. He couldn’t hold the tears anymore, there was the Hydra symbol on the paper like a watermark.

* * *

_It’s been five days since you left. You felt guilty, but they made their choice. Both of them left you when they went to war, they could’ve stayed home after Steve found Bucky, but they decided to play heroes. Bucky left so many people behind, but still, the world stayed the same. Nothing changed, the war was getting more destructive with every day that passed by. You heard that Steve left again. He just left, he didn’t even search for you. He left you again. You were twins, you had that special bond that was now broken. You had nothing anymore, no family, no friends just your backpack and your will. You had your mission, you knew what has to be done._

_After a few more days your brother died, you cried the whole day. It made you angry that other people who didn’t know him, cried, but they didn’t cry for your brother; for a boy who was your best friend, they cried for a hero, for red and white straps, not for your brother. None of them had the right to mourn him, only you. They made a funeral for him after a few months when they stopped searching for him._

_You came to Brooklyn, to his grave. Another empty grave. They gave his flag to Winifred because nobody knew where you were. You were standing next to the big tree looking at the ceremony. There were so many people, but nobody of them cared, they were just there for a show._

_˝Are you sure you want this? ˝ Peggy stood beside you when the funeral ended._

_˝They killed him, Peggy. ˝ You didn’t look at her, keeping your eyes on Rebecca as she walked away. Bucky would be so happy to see her growing up, but that will never happen._

_˝Your decision is wrong. ˝_

_You turned on your heel to look at her. Her hair was curly and her makeup was flawless, but you could see that her eyes were red from crying._

_˝Peggy, you loved my brother, not me. You met me just a few days ago. I told you, I’m going, they wanted to take me for so long and I’m tired of running away and when they become careless I’ll kill them all. ˝_

_˝You? Y/N, you are a sweet girl who never held a gun. You.. ˝_

_˝Don’t talk to me like I’m a child. I know what’s at the stake. I had two men that I loved with my whole heart and now they are both dead. My heart is empty as their graves, but luckily Peggy I held in my hands more than guns. While you were at my age trying to make perfect curls, I was fighting on the streets and in this couple of months, I did more than just holding a gun. ˝ You were just a few inches away from her, so she stepped back. You were much shorter than her, but you were frightening._

_˝Steve wouldn’t be happy about what am I going to do. ˝_

_˝Trust me, Peggy, he would do the same if he was in my place, if anything happens to me, you have to promise me that you will never tell anyone what I’ve done. Becca is my only family now and if I die, I want you to tell her that I was happy. Promise me,” you were emotional. You decided to cross the line by giving yourself to the people who killed your brother. You were twins and they thought that there is something special with your blood that you will be good as Steve._

_˝ I promise. If you see him before me, tell him that I’m sorry,” Peggy said pulling you in a hug._

_˝This is my choice and there’s nothing for you to be sorry about. I chose this path, It’s on me. ˝_


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During the saddest part of Reader’s life, she made the biggest decision ever.
> 
> Warnings: blood, cursing, violence, mentions of death

Tony gathered everyone in the conference room. He waited for them to settle down before he started.

˝As you all know, a few days ago, there was a breach in the Tower. ˝ Tony stopped for a moment looking at Steve and Bucky. ˝FRIDAY didn’t respond because she didn’t saw a treat. ˝

˝What are you talking about?” Natasha leaned in her chair, glancing at Tony.

¨Steve I’m sorry, but they should know. ˝ 

Bruce, Wanda, and Pietro stared at Steve waiting for an answer while Peter and Vision were looking at the screen on the wall. ˝Who is she? ˝ Scott asked, breaking the silence.

Steve looked at the screen at the photo where you were sitting on the swing. Bucky was standing behind you while Steve was on your right side.

˝Where did you get that? It’s personal. ˝ Bucky stood up walking to Stark.

˝Easy, you have to tell them.˝ Tony insisted and Bucky looked at Steve.

˝You are fine with this?˝ Steve couldn’t even look at him.

˝Bucky please sit down,˝ Wanda said reassuring him that there must be a good reason for what Stark was doing.

˝This girl, her name is Y/N Rogers, she is Steve’s sister. ˝

˝Was,˝ Steve interrupted Tony.

˝What? ˝Pietro asked, not following.

˝She was my sister. ˝

˝Y/N died in 1979. at least that was written on her grave, but she disappeared just a few days after Barnes was taken by Hydra. There is no record about her like she didn’t have a life in between that date and the date of her death. ˝

˝I’m sorry about what happened, but if she is dead, why are we here?˝ Natasha asked.

˝Because when we had an intruded, FRIDAY did nothing to stop her. She identified her as Y/N Rogers, a dead person. The whole system was thinking that it was a bug so it restarted and during that time she was already in and out.˝ Tony explained and he sat down waiting for Bucky or Steve to continue.

˝So your sister is alive. Do we know who is she working for?˝ Wanda asked, she could’ve taken all the information she needed from them, but she respected them too much for that.

˝Steve thought Hydra,˝ Tony answered. ˝But the two men who were keeping us busy they don’t work for Hydra they are mercenaries.˝

˝If she is not Hydra, why would she need Barnes?˝ Pietro was taping quickly with a pen against the table turning all the attention to himself.

˝We think she went rouge. She wants what Hydra needs. ˝

˝But she shot you both.˝

˝I know Peter, but she didn’t really hurt anyone. She is still my sister. ˝

˝Steve let’s be reasonable, with Bucky we had luck and he is here with us. But you said it yourself, it’s been more than seventy years. Why would she come for Bucky now?˝ Natasha didn’t believe that you were Steve’s sister, she never believed in luck and now Steve had his best friend back and maybe his sister, there was too many coincidences and she didn’t believe in that.

˝I don’t know. Maybe she is finally reaching for us.˝ 

Bucky silently stood up, glancing at the screen before he left the room.

* * *

  


 

Steve came in first. Wade and Victor were sitting at the table. They didn’t see him as a threat so they kept eating.

˝Where is she?˝ Bucky asked, walking in after Steve. Wade got up from his chair, grabbing his sword.

˝You should leave.˝

˝Where is she? ˝ Bucky asked again and this time Victor spoke.

˝She left.˝

˝Where? ˝ Bucky came closer he was ready to kill them both for the information.

˝I don’t know. When she leaves nobody can find her.˝ Victor got up from his chair, walking passed Bucky when he grabbed his hand.

˝Were you there when they took her?˝

˝What are you talking about?˝ Victor asked.

˝Hydra.˝

˝We don’t work for them.˝ Victor stepped away from Bucky.

˝Who placed bones in her grave?˝ Steve placed his shield down.

˝I did.˝ Victor said sternly looking directly into Bucky’s eyes.

˝Why?˝ Bucky looked away from him, his heart stopped for a second.

˝It was her way out. After she slaughtered the whole Hydra facility, she had to disappear, so I buried her. ˝

˝But I don’t understand why do you care? ˝ Wade asked.

˝She is my sister. ˝

˝Oh, yeah the same last name.˝ Wade said laughing. ˝I didn’t see that one coming. ˝

˝What do you mean you buried her? ˝ Bucky glanced from Wade back to Victor who sat down.

˝Your sister is in the ground, at least her body. ˝ Victor said.

˝What do you mean? ˝

˝It took us eight months while we were on the road. I had to cut her body parts so that she would be in the casket. ˝ He saw the shock in Bucky’s eyes. ˝Don’t worry, she is completely healthy now. ˝

Bucky couldn’t speak so Steve spoke instead of him.

˝Why did you come for Bucky, who paid you?˝

Wade laugh after he heard the question. ˝Paid us? Fuck, that’s a good one. Nobody paid. ˝

˝Then why?” Bucky finally spoke.

˝She wanted to get you out so that Hydra wouldn’t take you back. We knew that they had a plan and moving you from the Tower, she could keep you safe. ˝ Victor spoke slowly, giving them some time to process everything.

˝She came for me? ˝

˝It’s too late. She doesn’t remember you.” Wade spoke, and for a change he was serious.

˝Why would she come then? ˝

˝Because I gave her the letter that she left for herself. It was written in 1945.˝ Victor said going through the drawers looking for it.

˝Where did you find it? ˝

˝Peggy Carter. She gave me the letter and told me about her. Wade and I looked for her when we came everyone was already dead. When I gave her the letter, she couldn’t even recognize her handwriting, she was broken. ˝ Victor found the old letter and he offered it to Steve. ˝Whatever you read you have to know, she is not who she was. Going after her is a bad idea, she won’t hesitate this time, she wanted to save you as a promise to her former self, but now I’m not sure anymore that she is willing to do the same. After I gave her the letter she gave me a piece of paper with four simple words. She is no longer inside, I made her forget everything.˝

> _July 2nd, 1945_
> 
> _Whoever you are now, don’t forget who you were. All the suffering and all the pain that you felt was for those who you loved. You did it for your brother Steven Grant Rogers. He was your rock and your shoulder on which you cried on. You also did it for the man who took a big place in your heart James Buchanan Barnes, one that loved you despite all of your flaws. He and your brother were killed by the people who brought you only sorrow. If you are reading this at least visit their graves, even if you don’t remember. When everything comes to the end, I want you to do something for me, leave. Without saying goodbyes, without tears or anything, just leave this life and everything behind that you created after writing and before reading this letter. Leave and go where you always wanted to be. I know that you will remember that place, you could never forget about it and when you found it, just promise me you’ll stay there._
> 
> _With love, the person who died so that you could live_


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During the saddest part of Reader’s life, she made the biggest decision ever.
> 
> Warnings: blood, cursing, violence, mentions of death

_˝If you could go wherever you want, where would you go? ˝ Bucky held you in his arms. It was the last night that you had with him before he leaves with Steve and other Howling commandos._

_˝Somewhere safe, with you and Steve and the girl he likes. Just somewhere we could be happy. ˝  
_

_He tightened the grip around you, pulling you close on the small bed where you were both lying. ˝I wish that too. We could go to Scotland. ˝_

_˝Why Scotland? ˝ You said interested in what he is going to say._

_˝One buddy that was from Scotland, told me that that’s the place you want to see before you die. He showed me a photo, we should really go there. ˝ Bucky kissed the top of your head and you turned around to face him._

_˝Than promise me, after this, when you return, we’ll go. I have some savings and Steve too, we could leave, all of us. ˝_

_˝I promise. We’ll find our piece of paradise there. ˝_

* * *

The cold water sent chills through your body. You just stepped into the river. After two years, it became your routine, but a good one. Every day after your morning run you would come to swim. There was a small forest near it and sometimes you would have a feeling that somebody was watching you, but you would always ignore it. You didn’t want to live like you were on the run anymore, you wanted a life. When you heard something on the edge of the woods you quickly came out putting clothes over your wet swimsuit. You walk in a hurry, looking over your shoulder. You were close to your house when you bumped into something hard. Looking up you were met with bright blue eyes. The strands of his short brown hair were going over his eyes.

˝Sorry, James. I should really watch where I’m going,” you said with a smile.

˝I don’t mind you bumping in me, doll. ˝ He was really a sweet guy. You meet James a few months after you moved to Scotland, he was familiar to you. Not just his looks, he felt familiar. He reminded you of the man that you once loved. You were having flashbacks from your past, but sometimes they were intertwined with your present. You’ve been through so much that for once you tried to not question everything and just go with a flow.

˝You are such a player, but I’m not falling for that. ˝ You giggled walking pass him. You felt his hand on yours and you turned around. He had a wide smile on his face.

˝Is there a special reason for being so happy? Did Daisy make a move on you?˝

He chuckled at your last question. ˝I have my eyes on only one girl, but she keeps slipping from my fingers. ˝

˝Stop wearing gloves and maybe you will catch her.˝ You moved away from him and in a few seconds, he was walking with you. ˝Are you following me? ˝ You stopped walking and look him in the eyes. He lowered his head and took one of your hands in his. ˝Please don’t use one of your pick up lines on me, they are so old. Did your grandpa leave you a book full of them or they came naturally to you? ˝ You tried to lighten the mood because you noticed the change in his posture.

˝Your brother came.˝ 

You pulled your hand from him feeling tears in your eyes.

˝My brother? James, I don’t have a brother˝ 

He was silent, avoiding your eyes. 

˝ What are you talking about? ˝

˝Steve Rogers, your brother, he… ˝

˝No… Steve is dead. My brother, he died years ago.˝ Your voice was shaking.

˝Y/N, do you know what happened during this seventy years? ˝ James reached forward and you stopped his hand before he could reach your face.

˝I wanted to forget, I don’t want to remember. I don’t know who you are, but I want you to leave me alone. To forget was the only decision that I made in the last seventy years that was completely my choice. ˝

He was broken. ˝But I love you. ˝

You furrowed your brows, not understanding why would he say that. ˝I’m sorry. But I don’t feel the same. You have to stay away from me. I don’t want the pieces of my past. I deserve to be happy. ˝

˝Y/N, baby, please… I know I’m different, but I need you and Steve needs you too. He finally retired and the part of the team. He really wants to see you. ˝

You just stared at him not knowing what to do. After more than seventy years the man you loved came back to you. You didn’t know what to do, you loved him there was no doubt about it, but you needed a fresh start, a new life and you will never have that if you keep holding on to your past that you don’t even remember.

˝Do you have it? ˝ you asked him. After a few seconds of silence, he finally realized what you were talking about, he moved the metal necklace over his head. That ring meant a lot to him so he decided to wear it next to his heart. You reached for the ring taking it without the word.

˝Are you going to give me a chance? ˝ He looked at you the same as he did before. You thought that it was just a normal look, but it wasn’t, you could see it now, but it was too late ‘cause you’ve already made up your mind.

˝I remember the ring, but not you. I remember the name James B. Barnes, but not your face. I remember my brother, but also his death and yours too. This doesn’t represent anything. It’s just a ring, nothing else, just a burden of our past. You can let go, I’ve already had. ˝

Before he could say anything you threw the ring towards the river, it landed close to the shore. His eyes were wide in shock, it wasn’t the ring that you throw away, it was his heart.

˝You are just going to walk away from me, from Steve? ˝ You turned your back to him walking towards your home to pack your things and leave; to break your own promise.

˝You both walked away from me.˝ 

He didn’t run to you, he ran towards the river stepping inside looking for the ring. It wasn’t just the ring it was his memory, not a burden it was the happiest memory he had.

As you walked away deciding to leave everything behind, you realized that you weren’t breaking any promise. It was never your idea to go to Scotland, it was not the place you wanted to stay. But what was it? Was it even a place where you wanted to stay forever, being happy or was it anywhere in the world with your somebody? All you knew was that you had to leave.

 

* * *

_˝This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.˝_

_Winston Churchill_


End file.
